1992 | Arielle

This the letter ii wrote to you on and about your birth and some things noted after you were born

You were born at 7:14am on the 27th of March 1992, and weighed 8lbs. The Hebrew date I think was the 22nd day of Adar.

FROM DAD – 3/27/92

The whole pregnancy had gone well. We had planned the baby for a Spring delivery because the latter months of Talya’s pregnancy through the height of the summer were difficult for Mom. The hot humid summers of New England are mostly unbearable. We were lucky therefore to time this one appropriately. The early ultrasound was done by Dr Beryl Benacceraf, and everything looked perfect. In fact the fetal pictures looked very much like Talya in profile but I suspect the images being reflective mostly of bone structure was not reflective of the facial features. Beryl had started to look for the sex of the baby – but was stopped short by us. Nevertheless no penis was seen and we therefore suspected that we had another girl – and were delighted.

Unfortunately Dr Marcus our obstetrician, was going on vacation during the expected week of the delivery, and so we were expecting to be delivered by one of his partners if the baby came on time. Since Talya was two weeks late, he suspected that the new one would be late, and he had a 50 dollar bet with Naomi that we would be late again and that he would deliver the new baby. She won.

On the night of the 25th, Naomi was having contractions through the night, that were fairly regular, and so we knew that the time was drawing closer. During the day of Thursday the 26th, she had very few contractions. As soon as I arrived home from work, the contractions started again and became fairly regular by 8:30 being spaced at 3-5 minute intervals.

Quite a few people called that night – possibly they knew something. Jeanette Kuvin especially seems to have a keen 6th sense. Greg Faust called. He had just finished his piano lesson and wanted to play his first song on the phone. Geoff called in his sensitive way. Ravin called and he also wanted to find out the news. We did not let on – yet!

Jackie Cid our Chilean baby sitter, slept over at the house, with her cousin Jeanette, as we went off to the hospital hoping not to be turned back as was the case with Talya. We decided to drive in our old Honda hatchback Accord of 1986 vintage with 137,000 miles – “Harry”, – since he was the car of our courtship, had taken me to our wedding, and had driven Talya to and from the hospital when she was born. We drove the same route from our home in Newton with a specific memory of the disturbing bumps in the road as we drove down Beacon street around the reservoir near Boston College.

It was a rainy but warm night. We had just had two major snowstorms the week before, there was still snow on the ground but the promise of Spring was in the air.

We arrived at the hospital around 10:30 pm

and the contractions were coming on strong and frequently. We again parked the car along the meters on Brookline avenue, and made our way with difficulty to the Beth Israel emergency room as the rain fell gently.

Mom preferred to walk to the Labor and delivery room. Hospital rules being as they are required an orderly and wheel chair to accompany us, so there we were – Mom waddling along, the orderly pushing an empty wheel chair, and me with a wet umbrella that I could not close properly, and the overnight suit cases. Ther L&D room 11 was on the 10th floor, and our 1st nurse was Mary. As soon as Mom was put on the monitors and put into bed the contractions started to slow, and we were afraid that we were going to have to go home again. A medical student came to take a history and then a resident – Hope examined Mom and found that the cervix was dilated to 4 cms. which meant that we could stay, and that we could get an epidural injection to help her with the pain. By this time Mom’s nurse had changed to Fileepa Gomes from the Cape Verde islands, a quiet spoken Spanish speaking and very soothing nurse helped Mom. Dr Vivienne Kim was the anesthesiologist (a fellow Penn graduate). She asked me to leave the room, but I stood behind the curtain so that I could be with Mom. The first epidural was very uncomfortable. It had veered off to the side so that Mom felt an electric shock go down her left leg into her knee. This settled but the anesthetic did not affect one segment of the uterus, so that they tried all sorts of tricks over the next two hours to help Mom but to no avail. The right lower quadrant of her uterus still was uncomfortable. The nurse and I suggested that it be changed, much to Mom’s desires. But it was worthwhile, since Mom was much more comfortable after that, so much so, that her labor slowed down with contractions 20 minutes apart, and your head slipped back. I omitted to mention that the obsterician on duty covering the practice was Doctor Henry Klapholz, a grey haired kind and very experienced obstetrician. It came to my mind how important it was to have some grey hair of wisdom at times like this. He opted for the ways of nature as the first line, and waited patiently for them to do their thing. Thus after the waters broke and your head had slipped back (almost as though you had second thoughts of coming out) he decided to see if normal contractions would bring you back down again. But as I told you, they slowed down, and it was then that he decided to use oxytocin to induce the contractions. Soon enough, the contractions started again, and your head was down, and you decided to brave the new world. Mom was quite comfortable all this time, only with some anxiety and hopes only of your being healthy. The resident examined Mom and her cervix was 5 or 6 cms. dilated which meant that there was still some time before you came out.

We were a little disappointed because it meant a new team was going to deliver you because it was getting to morning, and change of shift. It seemed so odd that the doctor that had taken care of Mom during pregnancy, Dr Ronnie Marcus, was not going to be there, and Dr. Klapholz whom we had never met was going to be asssociated with us at this very special time without our ever having met him. There was something wrong with this.

We have reached a high civilization here in the US, and it will be even higher when you read this, but with the advance of science we seem to be losing our humanity. Our insides, our body our mind and our souls have the same needs as did those of our forefathers thousands of years ago, and to know this, and live by it is important. What is new in the outside world in this high culture is important but we tend to focus more on the new things, (because they are fashionable) and not what is tried and tested and fact.

However we were extremely fortunate with Dr Klapholz, who had the right mix of warmth and kindness, calm and sincerity, that made us feel very comfortable to share this moment with him and the team.

Mom began to shiver and feel very uncomfortable and felt a fullness in her rectum. The shivering was a common symptom of Mom’s some of it related to nervousness, and some related to “hormonal” activity, seen in many women in labor.

She was reexamined by the resident, Hope, who said that your head was well down and that Mom was fully dilated, and this was to our surprise, joy, since it meant that we were going to see you soon. I was a little anxious, because Talya had taken two hours to come out at this stage, and it was a very trying time for both Mom and I. However there had been some advancement, in that the epidural injection at a more dilute solution was continued so that Mom was able to push, but not feel the pains of contractions.

So I braced myself to Mom’s right side, Fileepa to her left, and Dr Klapholz and Hope, hurriedly gowning and gloving themselves, were placed at the bottom of the bed. As the first wave of contraction began, Mom took a deep breath (and so did I) closed her eyes and really concentrated on pushing in the right places . There were three breaths for the first contraction with small progress, three breaths for the second and third contractions, by which time I could already see your head. I couldn’t believe it. As the third wave of contraction began, before Mom even started to push your head popped out. It was a truly joyous and miraculous moment. They cleaned your nose and mouth, and you started crying. With the second and third contractions you were out and on Mom’s belly and we both burst into tears of joy to see a healthy baby, and a sister and friend for Talya. Mom was a litle more vocal than I, but we were just crying and crying.

Many people hope for a boy as the first, or to have a combination of a boy and a girl. I was secretly hoping for a girl, and I was so thrilled that you were what you were. Many times in your life you will wonder if you were what we desired, and you should always rest assured that you are exactly as we wanted you – yourself.

Dr Klapholz turned to me at this time and asked me to cut the cord which I did, starting your independence in this world.

I have thought about this a lot and have realised, that our job as parents is to make you a full and rounded person, whose talents are fully explored so that you can go out into the world independent confident, sensitive, loving, and humbled by the powers that are stronger than you. Cutting the cord was the first step to your independence. You will first gain physical independence, then emotional impendence and then spiritual independence. These will not occur sequentially and chronologically in a simplistic way, but will occur simultaneously, each with a dominance at certain phases of your life.

My reflex theory is one I strongly believe in and will not elaborate at this time, since you will hear it many times from me, and I wont bore you with it now. I just want you to know that I have a strong belief in it, and will use it to help in your development – and it came to mind as we spoke of independence. The other tenant of my existence is a quote from Pirkei Avoth – On three things the world stands – on Torah, on avodah and on gemillot chasadim – your relationship with G-d, your relationship with yourself, and your relationship with your fellow man.

You were born at 7:14am on the 27th of March 1992, and weighed 8lbs. The hebrew date I think was the 22nd day of Adar.

The due date of your birth was the 25th of March. I had told Mom that I wanted one of three dates for you. My birthday, the 18th of March, the 27th of March (my barmitvah date, and lots of connotations with 9’s and 7’s and multiples of three, something that is common to our family) or the 30th of March. She accomodated with the 27th of March 1992, at 7:14 in the morning – it could not have been better. 7 is a very lucky number in Judaism. The Lubavitcher Rebbe Schneerson, lives in house 770 in New York Crown Heights.

Interestingly, today (4/14/92) I started opening some mail and came across the following article that Uncle Baruch sent me. It was in the L’Chaim publication dated 22 Adar number 144, and dated 27th March.- what a coincidence – Mom and I had been to the Hebrew bookshop for Perry’s Cos and I was looking around for a book on the significance of numbers in Judaism and did not find anything – and today I came across this!

LIVING WITH

THE TIMES

The number seven is a recurring motif in the Torah: Shabbat is the seventh day of the week; Shavuot falls exactly seven weeks after Passover; the Shmitta year is the seventh year; and the Yovel (Jubilee Year) comes after every seven Shmitta years.

Seven symbolizes the cyclical nature of the world, which was created in six days, the seventh day completed the ‘seven days of building.” The whole cycle of the world evolves around the number seven.

At the end of last week’s Torah portion, we find mention of he seven days of consecration of the Sanctuary. The Torah ,states: “For seven days shall your consecration last, ” and” at the door of the Tabernacle shall you abide for seven days.”

But at the beginning of this week’s portion, Shemini, we come across an entirely new theme, the concept of eight. ,Shemini – which means “eighth” begins with the words: ‘And it came to pass on the eighth day.”

The seven days of consecration culminated in the dedication of the altar. On the next day, referred to as “the eighth day,” the dedication of Aaron and his sons took place–something not directly related to the consecration of the Sanctuary itself. Since this seems to have no connection to the consecration, why is it considered the eighth day?

While seven stands for wholeness and completion within nature, eight symbolizes that which is on an even higher level than nature–the aspect of G-dliness which is not confined to the laws of creation. We learn that on the eighth day “G-d appeared unto you”–there was an even greater revelation of G-dliness. If this is so, why did the supernatural revelation (the number “8”) come as a continuation of what occurred on the first seven days~ Why did the supernatural revelation come only after the revelation of G-d in nature?

Furthermore, all of the great revelations of G-dliness that will take place after Moshiach comes are dependent upon our deeds now. How can our actions in this limited world bring about revelations of holiness above the laws of nature?

G-d asks of us only that of which we are capable. If we give G-d our whole effort, our complete dedication, then we receive the G-dly revelations as a gift from Above. If we give G-d the whole “seven” of our natural abilities, He will grant us he revelations of holiness indicated by the number eight.

The revelations in the Sanctuary occurring on the eighth day were only possible after the Jews did all that was required of them during the first seven. Even though G-dliness, as it exists above nature, is infinitely higher than what we can attain through our own deeds alone, G-d supplied the rest after we did our part. And this power every Jew has–the ability to relate to G-d even as He exists above natural law. Adapted from the works of the Lubavitcher Rebbe.

Initially when I heard you weighed 8 lbs – I thought would it not have been nice if she weighed 7 ponds and 14 ozs. – and now I know why you weighed exactly eight pounds.

Baby Requirements

Baby Requirements:

Clothes

Wash Before Use

Onesies 2

Stretchy 2

Tee Shirts 2 Long Sleeve With Snaps

Bath Tub And Sponge

Gerry

Car Seat Head Pillow

Diaper Pail

Gerry